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Posts Tagged ‘money mindset’

One of my business goals for 2010 is to deepen my local network. Poet and corporate consultant David Whyte is fond of saying, “Sometimes the truth depends on a walk around the lake.” Having a trusted a colleague to stroll around the lake with can be just the thing to take things to the next level. Besides, hugs over Skype aren’t the same.

Last night, I put this intention into action by going to a new networking event.  I walked into a noisy crowd of over 70 people with only a few familiar faces.  As a relative introvert, this was a bit overwhelming.  Recognizing that overwhelm wasn’t going to lead to the results I was hoping for, I took a few moments to get centered.

As soon as I did, I noticed a friend I hadn’t seen and made my way over to her table.  When she saw me she said, “Oh my goodness!  We were just talking about you and EFT!“  Turns out, she was sitting with a colleague who has a consulting business.  This consultant had recently began experimenting with using EFT in her business and was thrilled to meet me. We spent much of the night having a high energy conversation about EFT and applying energy psychology in business settings.

Synchronicity is VERY Attractive

Back in the 1930’s, Carl Jung created the term “synchronicity” for events like what happened last night.  He observed, “when coincidences pile up in this way, one cannot help being impressed by them.“  Imagine being the woman I met last night and having someone who has experience with something that is a leading edge in your business manifest before your eyes.  How likely is it that you would forget that?

As I have increasingly cleared my own limiting beliefs, these type of ‘coincidences’ have been happening more and more often. And, my experience is that Jung is absolutely right – each time it happens, people are deeply moved.

How to Attract More Everyday Miracles

Now I don’t know anyone who can walk on water or conjure up a 7 course meal at the wave of her fingertips.  At the same time, I do see that conscious business owners often share this experience of marvelous surprises happening increasingly more often.  Are these accidents or is there anything we can do to increase how often they happen?

Let me be clear that I don’t think we can MAKE things like this happen.   What I think we can create are the conditions in our lives for synchronicity to happen more often.  Here are 3 strategies for infusing your success plan with more everyday magic:

1. Clear the beliefs about having to MAKE your success goals happen. In most business thought, there is an underlying belief that for you to succeed, you have to MAKE it happen.  Think of the term, “Self-made millionaire”.  When we buy into these understandings of success, we are setting ourselves up for stress and struggle.  My favorite way to clear these kinds of beliefs is with EFT, Money Matrix and other energy psychology tools.
2. Appreciate the synchronicity that has already happened in your life. Every one of us has had some experiences of synchronicity in our lives.  Prime your everyday miracle pump by bringing these experiences to mind with as much sensory details as you can.  Re-member literally means “to re-embody”.  Writing or drawing these experiences are a great way to do this. Also, be on the lookout for any little magical events that happen each day and appreciate the heck out of them.  Don’t limit yourself to the area of success and money – notice it in all areas of your life.
3. Invite More Magic Into Your Life. My favorite way to do this is with Law of Attraction tools like the Focus Wheel.  For instance, after last night’s experience, I did a Focus Wheel this morning on the theme of “There’s more and more everyday magic in my business.”  We can deliberately attract more of what we want in our life.

For thousands of years, spiritual people have observed that it is possible for us to increase our ability to be in what athletes call “The Zone”.  When we are in this state, both the number and the magnitude of the synchronicities in our lives go up.  Infusing your success plan with more of this energy is both fun and effective.

As I write this post from my favorite cafe, there’s snow coming down and the weather guy tells us were in for two more days of it. It has me thinking about my current lifestyle.  I’m one of those lucky folks that can work from anywhere. I almost never HAVE to go out.

It hasn’t always been this way.  8 years ago,  I was the director of a small, innovative non-profit.  While we were doing great work, the organization was barely making it financially and I was only earning about $30,000 per year.   Given my experience and my responsibilities as a new dad, this was source of great frustration.

Is staying stuck costing you?

Part of me was ready for a change.  I remember buying a book called, The Therapist as Life Coach. With my experience, I knew I had what it took to be a great coach.  However, I couldn’t wrap my brain around how to attract clients.  I started looking into coaching for this.  I realized it was going to take thousands of dollars plus time to learn what I needed to know.

Staying the Same Costs $100,000’s

At this point, I did what many people do – I said, “I don’t have the money or the time for this.“  I tried to put my dreams on the shelf and go on living the same small life.

When we really have a dream, it isn’t easy to sweep it under the rug.  My abandoned intentions of helping more people and making an authentic 6 figure income festered.  The energy came out in the form of frustration towards my then wife.  I turned into one very unhappy camper.

My ex soon got tired of living with this negative guy.  She kicked me out and started divorce proceedings.  Over a short period of time, I lost EVERYTHING. I found myself alone in an efficiency apartment in a new city.

From my new perspecitve, I realized that my limiting beliefs around money had been operating my entire adult life – more than 20 years.  I could see that if I had made a relatively small investment of money and time, I would likely have made a HUGE financial return in addition to the spiritual, physical and emotional ones.

In fact, multiplied over the period of my adult life, I could see that my decision to stay the same was the most expensive decision I had ever made.

What are the TRUE Costs?

Fortunately, the mess I describe above has had some incredible benefits.  For instance, I was introduced to energy psychology tools like EFT – I don’t know how I would have survived the divorce without it.  And, I finally sought out several coaches that helped me learn the mindset and marketing skills that I use in the work I do now.

In my work with clients today, I often hear about their thoughts and fears upon adding up the costs of what learning new skills are going to cost.  In truth, I want you to do this figuring. I don’t want you to blindly commit to a process that is a major investment of time and money.

At the same time, I also want to you to honestly ask yourself the question, “What will it cost me if I stay the same?“  Too many people add up the costs of change carefully while completely ignoring the fact that staying on the same track will also impact your life financially and otherwise.

How do the costs of change compare to the costs of staying on the same track you are on?  Five years from now where will you be if you stay on exactly the road you are on right now? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the form of a comment below.

Lately, I’ve been seeing the issue of impatience pop up in a number of sessions.  As in, “Why is it taking SO LONG for things to change?!?“  When a theme repeats like this, I know it’s time to write about it.  If you’ve ever felt like your success plan was taking too darn long, I encourage you to keep reading.

How Listening to A Park Bench Made One Man Wealthy

One of my favorite stories about the energy dynamics of change comes from the spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle.  Today, many people know him as Oprah’s friend and best selling author.  Many people don’t know that before he became famous, Eckhart Tolle was stuck and confused.  He didn’t have a stable home or job.

Eckhart knew he wanted a different life, but he didn’t know how.  One day sitting on a park bench, Eckhart had a realization that changed his life and brought incredible success.  He realized that he was spending a great deal of energy fighting the circumstances of his life. Though he didn’t want to be confused and jobless, he was.

Eckhart understood that the only way things were going to really change is if he could “surrender” and “walk through the doorway of NOW”.  That insight lead to a feeling of profound well-being so strong that people started to approach him for guidance.  His career as a spiritual teacher was born.

What’s Your Park Bench?

You don’t have to have to be almost homeless to have this stuck energy operating in your life.  For me, it was being in position of going through a divorce and being “just over broke” doing work I didn’t like.

In fact, there is a basic energy equation when we are feeling frustrated.  It is:

I’m frustrated that I’m here (in a place I don’t want to be) when I want to be there (in a place I want to be more).

Wanting change and success is a good thing.  At the same time, it’s difficult for success to flow smoothly with this kind of tension in your system.

Easing Into Success with EFT

Energy intelligent people will recognize that being in this state of tension and having your focus on what’s not working is going to attract more tension into your life.  Let’s take a look at how to shift into a place of being more ready for change with EFT (if you want to learn EFT basics, click here).

Frustration Sequence – The Problem

Karate Chop: Even though it feels like things are taking too long to change and I’m feeling impatient, I’m willing to be a little kinder and gentler with myself anyway.

Eyebrow: I don’t know why things in my life aren’t changing faster.
Side of eye: I’m feeling impatient with the pace of change in my life.
Under the eye: I’ve been working on change for some time now.
Under the nose: Why aren’t I further along?
Chin: It’s taking SO long.
Collarbone: I feel lots of pressure to change things NOW.
Under the arm: I don’t like how long this is taking.

Take a deep breath and give a moment for this tapping sequence to settle.

Frustration Sequence – The Solution

Karate Chop: Even though in the past it feels like things weren’t changing fast enough, I’m choosing to find a more relaxed relationship with change now.

Eyebrow: In the past, I was focusing on what wasn’t going well in terms of change.
Side of the eye: No wonder I was feeling so frustrated.
Under the eye: What would happen if I could find a way to release that pressure?
Under the nose: What if I COULD relax about the pace of change in my life?
Chin: I wonder if I could actually change faster if I didn’t feel so much pressure?
Collarbone: I give myself permission to experiment with releasing this pressure.
Under the arm: I’m excited to work towards my success goals in more relaxed way.

Take a deep breath and give a moment for this tapping sequence to settle.

Summing it up

One of the great paradoxes about life changes is that they tend to happen the fastest when we are in a state that athletes call “The Zone”.  Pushing gets in the way of this.  Instead, use your favorite clearing tool to release the frustration and struggle patterns.

Next, allow yourself to experiment.   What would it be like to allow yourself to work from the Zone more?  How are you already doing this?  I’d love to hear your thoughts in the form of a comment below.

As I write this post, there’s snow on the ground and the sky is grey with possibility.  In the Northern Hemisphere, we’ve just passed the longest night of the year.  Little by little, the light is returning.

The new year is on many people’s minds.  While I don’t have any magical devices to show me exactly what the coming year will bring (sorry to disappoint you), I do believe that 2010 is going to be an awesome year for many readers of this blog.  Right about now, you’re probably asking, “What the HECK is he talking about?!?”

3  Reasons Spiritual Success Seekers Will Love 2010

1) It’s almost impossible to succeed without a clear sense of purpose. In the past, making money and things like purpose were hard to put into the same paragraph.  One of the things that has changed over the past year is that most people are spending money very differently.  They are asking more questions and exploring more deeply before they buy.

For spiritual people, this is GREAT news.  We know about intentions and purpose and the energy that lives underneath the surface of things.  While yesterday’s leaders with the old “pound them with advertising until they buy” mindset should be scared, our ability to have deeper conversations about what is truly valuable is an essential strength in today’s economy.

2) Spiritual people understand the power of NOW.

Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now. Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now.

Eckhart Tolle

These days, many people are trying to figure out how to get back to a point they were at in the past.  Similarly, many people – some with very important titles – are trying to figure out how to rush into a “new future” as fast as possible.   As a spiritual person, you know that both these efforts are wasting tremendous amounts of energy.

Right here in this moment – right now – there are TREMENDOUS opportunities. However, the person whose mind is clouded by fear, regret or a desire to rush into the future is going to be unable to take advantage of them.  As a spiritual person, you are more equipped to see the current opportunities.  You also are more able to take mindful actions that will birth these opportunities into the world.

Keep in mind that, because this moment is like no other, your opportunities may look very different than those that were present for your parents or even those in your life a few years ago.

3) We’ve practiced the art of mindful community for generations. About 8 years ago, I heard a prominent Buddhist teacher talk about the important of what the Buddhists call Sangha – the community one practices in.  It was one of those talks where you could feel the power of his words vibrating off the walls.

In sum, what this teacher said is that we humans are deeply relational critters.  Nothing impacts us more than the thoughts and feelings of those we are surrounded by.  So, one of the surest paths to ongoing spiritual growth is to surround yourself with others who are on a good path.

Unless you’re a recent transplant to planet Earth from some other corner of the universe – in that case, let me say WELCOME – you know that we are in the midst of a networking revolution.   For instance, there are currently over 50 million registered users of LinkedIn.  A FREE social networking site dedicated to the business user with 50 million subscribers – our grandparents had nothing like this.  Online and off, there never been more options for spiritual success seekers to tap into the power of mindful communities.  And no one is in a better position to make skillful use of the power of the Success Sangha than the readers of this blog.

What is 2010 going to be like for YOU?

Your success is very important to me.  In fact, it’s the reason I’m here on this beautiful planet.  I’d very much like to hear what you see ahead of you in 2010.  Please share your thoughts and questions in the form of a comment below.  And, thanks to all of you who make this community such a vibrant place to be part of.

I just got off the phone with Chip Engelmann, an EFT and Law of Attraction Coach and a friend of mine.  In addition to planning an exciting teleclass series we’ll be offering soon, we also spoke about the most frequent request we both hear in terms of EFT for Abundance – that is “How do I know what to tap on?”   It got me thinking that about the need for a blog post that gives you some insight into how experienced EFTers help their clients zero in on specific abundance blocks.

Here’s the three best ways to help you know what to tap on when you’re using EFT for Abundance:

Abundance blocks can feel like The Great Wall

1) Using the Tailender Technique. In EFT language, your tailenders are the “Yeah, but ..” part of an affirmation.  In other words, they are like an industrial strength rubber band tied around your waist that holds you back from making progress towards what you want.  In the Using the Tailender Technique, you deliberate explore your tailenders and find the issues that need clearing by doing so.

Start by finding a clear money affirmation that is a) believable and b) exciting to you.  For instance, “I easily and consistently make $100,000 per year.”  Once you have your affirmation, take 3 deep breaths.  Notice how your body feels and what thought are going through your mind.  This is your baseline.

Now, say your affirmation out loud, “I easily and consistently make $100,000 per year.”  Notice what happens in your body.  Say it out loud again.  This time notice what thoughts go through your mind. The body sensations and thoughts that happen after you say the affirmation usually have the energy of constriction.  These are your tailenders, the things that block you from creating more abundance.

For a moment, I ask you to relax your resistance towards your tailenders.  Be willing to explore them.  What does that body sensation remind you of?  Who does that negative thought bring to mind?  Through a curious exploration of your tailenders, you can find the core issues that are limiting your ability to be more successful in an authentic way.  Once you know the core issues, you on them.

2) Clear by the Numbers. Chip Engelmann has developed a technique where he has clients explore their feelings about making different amounts of money.  In this approach, you start with an amount that feels comfortable to you.  For instance, suppose you currently earn $30,000 per year.  You would state, “I easily and consistently earn $30,000 per year.”  Then, you notice how that feels.  You keep increasing the amount until you notice some discomfort.  For instance, suppose $40,000 feels comfortable but you notice a feeling of “I don’t think so” when you say “I easily and consistently earn $50,000 per year.”   Explore that feeling of “I don’t think so”.  Notice where you feel it in your body and who it reminds you of.   Then tap on these issues.

3) Clearing your Money Matrix. My favorite way to find your blocks is Money Matrix work.  Your Money Matrix is the energetic web that determines your current relationship with money. It is a combination of the important feelings, beliefs and relationships that you have with money.  When we are not experiencing the kind of success that we want, it’s often because our Money Matrix is being influenced by negative energies.

Below is the simple 4 step exercise I use with clients to help them understand their current energetic relationship with money and to know what to tap on when applying EFT for abundance.  Here are the four steps:

• Take 3 clearing and centering breaths. The purpose of this is to help you relax your system and increase your ability to be aware. With each breath, find yourself becoming a bit more relaxed and more of attention available in the present moment.
• Imagine that you are in a room with money. It’s a simple room, comfortably furnished. Notice where money is in relationship to you. Is it to one side, in the front, outside the room, etc? Take a minute to notice what you what you see in your mind’s eye.
• Notice who or what else is in the room with you. After you have a sense of who and what these presences are, notice where these other presences (people or things) are in relationship to you and to money. For instance, one client felt a 3 inch plate glass wall that was between her and money.  Notice what you what you see in your mind’s eye.
• Notice the feelings in your body about your current Money Matrix. Your Money Matrix is encoded into the cells of your body.  Paying attention to the feeling in the snapshot you see is a powerful way to access your code. What do you notice in your body and on a feeling level as you view this picture in your mind’s eye?  Once you know what your current Money Matrix looks like, you can use EFT to clear what is in the way and allow money to come much more easily into your life.

It’s rare that a mechanical application of EFT leads to abundance results.  These three techniques about allow people who are new to EFT for abundance or haven’t yet seen the success they want to get a much better picture of what to tap on.  Because abundance is a whole lot easier to move towards without the Great Wall of China in the way.

It happened again the other day. A woman called me – let’s call her Laura. Laura is a spiritual woman who has tried a number of ways to find success. She’s worked for purpose driven companies as well as started her own business. She’s also tried different abundance programs. She said, “I don’t understand it. I’m a smart person. I have lots of experience. I don’t understand why I’m still living month-to-month at this stage of my life.”

Better relationships = more money

It’s hard to increase your success when you think of money as just a colored piece of paper. Smart success seekers understand that money always comes to us through relationships. It’s a symbol we agree to use to express how much value we are providing to the people around us. One of the best ways to improve your income is to increase the number of quality relationships in your life.

Successful business people throughout the ages have known about the power of networking. In fact, groups like the Chamber of Commerce and Business Networking International teach that this is among the most powerful success tool there is.

The problem with most people’s approach is that it leaves out an understanding of mindset. Most people don’t get much from their attempts to increase their network (online or off) because inside they are asking questions like, “how can this person help me make money?”

Imagine you are a prospective client talking with someone you are considering doing business with. What do you feel in your body when the primary question in the person’s mind is “How can you help me make more money?” My first response is “Yuck, get me out of here!”

In order to experience an authentic increase in success, you need 4 kinds of relationships. They are:

1. Centered relationship with your Self
2. Flowing relationship with money
3. Purpose-driven relationship with clients/customers
4. Co-creative relationships with colleagues

Energy psychology tools, like EFT and Money Matrix, allow you to easily develop these four neccessary relationships for success. To help you learn how to do this, I’m doing a FREE teleclass on Sunday, August 30th at 2pm Eastern Standard Time. It’s called The Heart of Success: Money Matrix and the 4 Kinds of Relationships You Need to Succeed.

In today’s economy, if you are connected then you are valuable. With email, cell phones, social networking sites and other forms of technology, it’s easier to connect than ever. It’s your thoughts, feelings and behaviors – your Money Matrix – that determines whether or not these connections are a source of support and success. I’m offering this FREE class because I want you to know how to increase your success through the power of relationships.

Click here for information about the call.

Your Money Matrix is the energetic web that determines your current relationship with money. It is a combination of the important feelings, beliefs and relationships that you have with money.  When we are not experiencing the kind of success that we want, it’s often because our Money Matrix is being influenced by difficult or painful energies.

The good news is that you can use energy tools, like EFT for Abundance, to make profound shifts in your Money Matrix. But before you change anything, you need to know where you are now.  This post outlines a simple 4 step exercise I use with clients to help them understand their current energetic relationship with money.  Before you start, it’s helpful to have a pen and a piece of paper for taking a few notes.

1. Take 3 clearing and centering breaths. The purpose of this is to help you relax your system and increase your ability to be aware. With each breath, find yourself becoming a bit more relaxed and more of attention available in the present moment.

2. Imagine that you are in a room with money. It’s a simple room, comfortably furnished. Notice where money is in relationship to you. Is it to one side, in the front, outside the room, etc? Take a minute to write down what you what you see in your mind’s eye.

3. Notice who or what else is in the room with you. After you have a sense of who and what these presences are, notice where these other presences (people or things) are in relationship to you and to money. For instance, one client felt a 3 inch plate glass wall that was between her and money. Take a minute to write down what you what you see in your mind’s eye.

4. Notice the feelings in your body about your current Money Matrix. Your Money Matrix is encoded into the cells of your body.  Paying attention to the feeling in the snapshot you see is a powerful way to access your code. What do you notice in your body and on a feeling level as you view this picture in your mind’s eye?

For thousands of years, spiritual teachers have told us that knowing where we are in the moment is a key step towards being able to shift into a different future. Before you change your level of success, you need to know where you are right now.  Once you know what your current Money Matrix looks like, you can use EFT for Abundance and other energy tools to clear any energetic blocks to success and allow money to come much more easily into your life.

EFT for Abundance often doesn’t work because of our internal conflicts about money. This video shows you how to make more progress using EFT for abundance by clearing your internal money conflicts. Would appreciate your comments about whether this approach is helpful to you.