paulzelizer.com

Posts Tagged ‘Money and Spirituality’

One of my business goals for 2010 is to deepen my local network. Poet and corporate consultant David Whyte is fond of saying, “Sometimes the truth depends on a walk around the lake.” Having a trusted a colleague to stroll around the lake with can be just the thing to take things to the next level. Besides, hugs over Skype aren’t the same.

Last night, I put this intention into action by going to a new networking event.  I walked into a noisy crowd of over 70 people with only a few familiar faces.  As a relative introvert, this was a bit overwhelming.  Recognizing that overwhelm wasn’t going to lead to the results I was hoping for, I took a few moments to get centered.

As soon as I did, I noticed a friend I hadn’t seen and made my way over to her table.  When she saw me she said, “Oh my goodness!  We were just talking about you and EFT!“  Turns out, she was sitting with a colleague who has a consulting business.  This consultant had recently began experimenting with using EFT in her business and was thrilled to meet me. We spent much of the night having a high energy conversation about EFT and applying energy psychology in business settings.

Synchronicity is VERY Attractive

Back in the 1930’s, Carl Jung created the term “synchronicity” for events like what happened last night.  He observed, “when coincidences pile up in this way, one cannot help being impressed by them.“  Imagine being the woman I met last night and having someone who has experience with something that is a leading edge in your business manifest before your eyes.  How likely is it that you would forget that?

As I have increasingly cleared my own limiting beliefs, these type of ‘coincidences’ have been happening more and more often. And, my experience is that Jung is absolutely right – each time it happens, people are deeply moved.

How to Attract More Everyday Miracles

Now I don’t know anyone who can walk on water or conjure up a 7 course meal at the wave of her fingertips.  At the same time, I do see that conscious business owners often share this experience of marvelous surprises happening increasingly more often.  Are these accidents or is there anything we can do to increase how often they happen?

Let me be clear that I don’t think we can MAKE things like this happen.   What I think we can create are the conditions in our lives for synchronicity to happen more often.  Here are 3 strategies for infusing your success plan with more everyday magic:

1. Clear the beliefs about having to MAKE your success goals happen. In most business thought, there is an underlying belief that for you to succeed, you have to MAKE it happen.  Think of the term, “Self-made millionaire”.  When we buy into these understandings of success, we are setting ourselves up for stress and struggle.  My favorite way to clear these kinds of beliefs is with EFT, Money Matrix and other energy psychology tools.
2. Appreciate the synchronicity that has already happened in your life. Every one of us has had some experiences of synchronicity in our lives.  Prime your everyday miracle pump by bringing these experiences to mind with as much sensory details as you can.  Re-member literally means “to re-embody”.  Writing or drawing these experiences are a great way to do this. Also, be on the lookout for any little magical events that happen each day and appreciate the heck out of them.  Don’t limit yourself to the area of success and money – notice it in all areas of your life.
3. Invite More Magic Into Your Life. My favorite way to do this is with Law of Attraction tools like the Focus Wheel.  For instance, after last night’s experience, I did a Focus Wheel this morning on the theme of “There’s more and more everyday magic in my business.”  We can deliberately attract more of what we want in our life.

For thousands of years, spiritual people have observed that it is possible for us to increase our ability to be in what athletes call “The Zone”.  When we are in this state, both the number and the magnitude of the synchronicities in our lives go up.  Infusing your success plan with more of this energy is both fun and effective.

As I write this post from my favorite cafe, there’s snow coming down and the weather guy tells us were in for two more days of it. It has me thinking about my current lifestyle.  I’m one of those lucky folks that can work from anywhere. I almost never HAVE to go out.

It hasn’t always been this way.  8 years ago,  I was the director of a small, innovative non-profit.  While we were doing great work, the organization was barely making it financially and I was only earning about $30,000 per year.   Given my experience and my responsibilities as a new dad, this was source of great frustration.

Is staying stuck costing you?

Part of me was ready for a change.  I remember buying a book called, The Therapist as Life Coach. With my experience, I knew I had what it took to be a great coach.  However, I couldn’t wrap my brain around how to attract clients.  I started looking into coaching for this.  I realized it was going to take thousands of dollars plus time to learn what I needed to know.

Staying the Same Costs $100,000’s

At this point, I did what many people do – I said, “I don’t have the money or the time for this.“  I tried to put my dreams on the shelf and go on living the same small life.

When we really have a dream, it isn’t easy to sweep it under the rug.  My abandoned intentions of helping more people and making an authentic 6 figure income festered.  The energy came out in the form of frustration towards my then wife.  I turned into one very unhappy camper.

My ex soon got tired of living with this negative guy.  She kicked me out and started divorce proceedings.  Over a short period of time, I lost EVERYTHING. I found myself alone in an efficiency apartment in a new city.

From my new perspecitve, I realized that my limiting beliefs around money had been operating my entire adult life – more than 20 years.  I could see that if I had made a relatively small investment of money and time, I would likely have made a HUGE financial return in addition to the spiritual, physical and emotional ones.

In fact, multiplied over the period of my adult life, I could see that my decision to stay the same was the most expensive decision I had ever made.

What are the TRUE Costs?

Fortunately, the mess I describe above has had some incredible benefits.  For instance, I was introduced to energy psychology tools like EFT – I don’t know how I would have survived the divorce without it.  And, I finally sought out several coaches that helped me learn the mindset and marketing skills that I use in the work I do now.

In my work with clients today, I often hear about their thoughts and fears upon adding up the costs of what learning new skills are going to cost.  In truth, I want you to do this figuring. I don’t want you to blindly commit to a process that is a major investment of time and money.

At the same time, I also want to you to honestly ask yourself the question, “What will it cost me if I stay the same?“  Too many people add up the costs of change carefully while completely ignoring the fact that staying on the same track will also impact your life financially and otherwise.

How do the costs of change compare to the costs of staying on the same track you are on?  Five years from now where will you be if you stay on exactly the road you are on right now? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the form of a comment below.

Lately, I’ve been seeing the issue of impatience pop up in a number of sessions.  As in, “Why is it taking SO LONG for things to change?!?“  When a theme repeats like this, I know it’s time to write about it.  If you’ve ever felt like your success plan was taking too darn long, I encourage you to keep reading.

How Listening to A Park Bench Made One Man Wealthy

One of my favorite stories about the energy dynamics of change comes from the spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle.  Today, many people know him as Oprah’s friend and best selling author.  Many people don’t know that before he became famous, Eckhart Tolle was stuck and confused.  He didn’t have a stable home or job.

Eckhart knew he wanted a different life, but he didn’t know how.  One day sitting on a park bench, Eckhart had a realization that changed his life and brought incredible success.  He realized that he was spending a great deal of energy fighting the circumstances of his life. Though he didn’t want to be confused and jobless, he was.

Eckhart understood that the only way things were going to really change is if he could “surrender” and “walk through the doorway of NOW”.  That insight lead to a feeling of profound well-being so strong that people started to approach him for guidance.  His career as a spiritual teacher was born.

What’s Your Park Bench?

You don’t have to have to be almost homeless to have this stuck energy operating in your life.  For me, it was being in position of going through a divorce and being “just over broke” doing work I didn’t like.

In fact, there is a basic energy equation when we are feeling frustrated.  It is:

I’m frustrated that I’m here (in a place I don’t want to be) when I want to be there (in a place I want to be more).

Wanting change and success is a good thing.  At the same time, it’s difficult for success to flow smoothly with this kind of tension in your system.

Easing Into Success with EFT

Energy intelligent people will recognize that being in this state of tension and having your focus on what’s not working is going to attract more tension into your life.  Let’s take a look at how to shift into a place of being more ready for change with EFT (if you want to learn EFT basics, click here).

Frustration Sequence – The Problem

Karate Chop: Even though it feels like things are taking too long to change and I’m feeling impatient, I’m willing to be a little kinder and gentler with myself anyway.

Eyebrow: I don’t know why things in my life aren’t changing faster.
Side of eye: I’m feeling impatient with the pace of change in my life.
Under the eye: I’ve been working on change for some time now.
Under the nose: Why aren’t I further along?
Chin: It’s taking SO long.
Collarbone: I feel lots of pressure to change things NOW.
Under the arm: I don’t like how long this is taking.

Take a deep breath and give a moment for this tapping sequence to settle.

Frustration Sequence – The Solution

Karate Chop: Even though in the past it feels like things weren’t changing fast enough, I’m choosing to find a more relaxed relationship with change now.

Eyebrow: In the past, I was focusing on what wasn’t going well in terms of change.
Side of the eye: No wonder I was feeling so frustrated.
Under the eye: What would happen if I could find a way to release that pressure?
Under the nose: What if I COULD relax about the pace of change in my life?
Chin: I wonder if I could actually change faster if I didn’t feel so much pressure?
Collarbone: I give myself permission to experiment with releasing this pressure.
Under the arm: I’m excited to work towards my success goals in more relaxed way.

Take a deep breath and give a moment for this tapping sequence to settle.

Summing it up

One of the great paradoxes about life changes is that they tend to happen the fastest when we are in a state that athletes call “The Zone”.  Pushing gets in the way of this.  Instead, use your favorite clearing tool to release the frustration and struggle patterns.

Next, allow yourself to experiment.   What would it be like to allow yourself to work from the Zone more?  How are you already doing this?  I’d love to hear your thoughts in the form of a comment below.

As I write this post, there’s snow on the ground and the sky is grey with possibility.  In the Northern Hemisphere, we’ve just passed the longest night of the year.  Little by little, the light is returning.

The new year is on many people’s minds.  While I don’t have any magical devices to show me exactly what the coming year will bring (sorry to disappoint you), I do believe that 2010 is going to be an awesome year for many readers of this blog.  Right about now, you’re probably asking, “What the HECK is he talking about?!?”

3  Reasons Spiritual Success Seekers Will Love 2010

1) It’s almost impossible to succeed without a clear sense of purpose. In the past, making money and things like purpose were hard to put into the same paragraph.  One of the things that has changed over the past year is that most people are spending money very differently.  They are asking more questions and exploring more deeply before they buy.

For spiritual people, this is GREAT news.  We know about intentions and purpose and the energy that lives underneath the surface of things.  While yesterday’s leaders with the old “pound them with advertising until they buy” mindset should be scared, our ability to have deeper conversations about what is truly valuable is an essential strength in today’s economy.

2) Spiritual people understand the power of NOW.

Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now. Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now.

Eckhart Tolle

These days, many people are trying to figure out how to get back to a point they were at in the past.  Similarly, many people – some with very important titles – are trying to figure out how to rush into a “new future” as fast as possible.   As a spiritual person, you know that both these efforts are wasting tremendous amounts of energy.

Right here in this moment – right now – there are TREMENDOUS opportunities. However, the person whose mind is clouded by fear, regret or a desire to rush into the future is going to be unable to take advantage of them.  As a spiritual person, you are more equipped to see the current opportunities.  You also are more able to take mindful actions that will birth these opportunities into the world.

Keep in mind that, because this moment is like no other, your opportunities may look very different than those that were present for your parents or even those in your life a few years ago.

3) We’ve practiced the art of mindful community for generations. About 8 years ago, I heard a prominent Buddhist teacher talk about the important of what the Buddhists call Sangha – the community one practices in.  It was one of those talks where you could feel the power of his words vibrating off the walls.

In sum, what this teacher said is that we humans are deeply relational critters.  Nothing impacts us more than the thoughts and feelings of those we are surrounded by.  So, one of the surest paths to ongoing spiritual growth is to surround yourself with others who are on a good path.

Unless you’re a recent transplant to planet Earth from some other corner of the universe – in that case, let me say WELCOME – you know that we are in the midst of a networking revolution.   For instance, there are currently over 50 million registered users of LinkedIn.  A FREE social networking site dedicated to the business user with 50 million subscribers – our grandparents had nothing like this.  Online and off, there never been more options for spiritual success seekers to tap into the power of mindful communities.  And no one is in a better position to make skillful use of the power of the Success Sangha than the readers of this blog.

What is 2010 going to be like for YOU?

Your success is very important to me.  In fact, it’s the reason I’m here on this beautiful planet.  I’d very much like to hear what you see ahead of you in 2010.  Please share your thoughts and questions in the form of a comment below.  And, thanks to all of you who make this community such a vibrant place to be part of.

Lately, I’ve been hearing myself say to clients repeatedly, “you need a prosperity buddy.”  When something keeps showing up like this, I know it’s time for a blog post.  In this post, I want to share with you what a prosperity buddy (also known as a mastermind buddy) is, where to find one and what to do once you have one.

It's more fun with a buddy!

What the heck is a prosperity buddy?

The biggest lesson most success seekers need to learn is how to consistently nurture their deepest desires.  Honestly, most of us aren’t very good at doing this.  This is why most abundance programs fail – they don’t teach us how to do the kind of ongoing tending that real success needs.

A prosperity or mastermind buddy is a deliberately chosen friend who we agree to get together with regularly and nurture each other’s success intentions.

Buddies set aside time, usually either weekly or bi-monthly, to trade experiences of sharing honestly about what their dreams are and work on releasing the limiting beliefs and feelings that are getting in the way of manifesting those dreams.  My favorite way of releasing the gunk that’s blocking success is with EFT.

Where the heck do I find a prosperity buddy?

“OK, sounds good Paul,” you may say, “but where do I FIND a prosperity buddy?”  Notice that in the above section, I underlined the idea that buddies are deliberately created. I’m going to share several ideas of where you can find a prosperity buddy below.  At the same time, keep in mind that for the process to work well, you need to have a buddy that you feel comfortable sharing emotional and financial information with.  Selecting a prosperity buddy is a great time to use your spiritual awareness and intuitive skills.

That said, here are 5 places to find a prosperity buddy:

1. Among people you already know and trust. Some of you already know people who would make great prosperity buddies.  Perhaps you have a friend, colleague or acquaintance you trust and believe would be open to this kind of ongoing supportive relationship.  Avoid trying to be a buddy with someone you are in a romantic relationship with.
2. The readers of this blog. People who read and comment on this blog tend to be spiritual and fun success seekers who are familiar with EFT and the Law of Attraction.  They also tend to know other people who fit this description.   Feel free to leave a comment that you’re looking for a buddy.
3. The forums at the main EFT website (www.emofree.com).  A number of my clients have found prosperity tapping buddies by connecting with people in these forums.  Specifically, there is a forum called “Abundance” which is focused on using EFT for money and success issues.
4. TappingBuddies.com While the activity on this site is less than what I wish it were, this site is focused on helping people find tapping buddies.
5. Social Network sites. Facebook, Twitter, Linked In and other such sites ROCK!  I met my awesome Mastermind buddy, Sejual Shah, this way.  Through the magic of these sites, you have the opportunity to get to know someone in a safe and easy manner.  Once you meet someone you like the energy of, invite them to have a conversation to get to know them better.  If you get a good sense of the person, then bring up the idea of becoming prosperity buddies.

I’ve got a buddy.  What the heck do we do now?

Here’s the 6 steps to creating a good prosperity buddy relationship:

1. Start with appreciation. Appreciate your buddy and yourself for doing this.  Appreciation goes a long way towards creating the kind of safe and fun environment that will serve you well over time.
2. Leave judgment at the door. Your role is not to judge or fix your buddy.  Instead, help your buddy clear the blocks and track the progress that she is making over time.  Deep listening is also extremely valuable.
3. Agree to a regular meeting schedule. Remember the whole point of this relationship is to create an environment of consistent nurturing.  Most buddies meet either every week or bi-monthly.
4. Check in – from the heart. At the start of each meeting, take turns doing a short (3-4 minutes) check in.  Be authentic about what you are noticing in relationship to your deepest success dreams.  Pay particular attention to the emotions – that’s the key to where the energy is for you.
5. Use energy tools to remove the blocks. Once you’ve both checked in, decide whose turn it will be that meeting to do clearing work.   It’s best to devote a meeting to one person’s issues (alternating works great).  Use EFT or another energy tool to clear the blocks that are getting in the way of your success dreams.  Feel free to contact me if you need help learning to do this.
6. With the blocks out of the way, explore what action step you are inspired to do. Once the blocks are out of the way, aligned actions steps will naturally appear.  No pushing or heavy handed advice giving needed.

I hope this post inspires you create a prosperity or mastermind buddy relationship in your life.  In comparing notes with the dozens of prosperity and success coaches I know, our collective experience is that this is one of the most important predictors of people who actually MANIFEST their success dreams.

One of my main goals for creating this site is to advocate for authenticity – I want you to believe in your bones that it is possible to be a fun, authentic and spiritual human and make plenty of money.  What does this have to do with sugar water?  Let me explain ..

This morning I met with Sejual Shah, a wonderful EFT practitioner – her site is www.healthyinmind.com – for our weekly Mastermind session.  It was my turn and I brought up fear I was feeling about a project I’ll be announcing soon.  This project is going to mean MUCH more visibility for me and my business.

Sugar Water, Money and Spirituality

I couldn’t quite put my finger on this fear.  Sejual helped me clarify and clear what was going on.

When I was a kid, we lived a few miles from the headquarters from one of the largest soft drink companies in the world.  Also as a child, my father worked in a company whose major source of income was tobacco products. Many of my friends parents worked in environments like this.

Even then, I felt strongly that making tons of money selling soda (yep, that’s the sugar water)  and other products that damaged peoples health was out of integrity.  Looking back from today’s vantage point, I realize that early in life I took a spiritual vow to value integrity over money.

While I have done LOTS of work on allowing money and my spiritual beliefs to live well together, this new venture I’m embarking on brought up this theme at a new level.  While most of me is excited and aligned with increased success, I realized that there was a part of me feeling afraid I might “step out of integrity as I step into the limelight.”

Four things I learned about the dynamics of increasing success from this experience:

1. At the threshold of each new level of success, we are likely to experience new issues. This is normal – when we come to the edge of our known world, it’s our nervous system’s job to send out a signal.  It’s a sign saying, “You are leaving the known, are you sure you want to do this?”
2. Spiritual people often take vows that impact our relationship with money. My mostly unconscious vow had been to value integrity more than I value money.  Thanks to today’s session, I now believe that I can continue to find more and more ways to make money with the power of my integrity.
3. Without clearing, #1 and #2 often sabotage our success. My own life story prior to energy psychology is a tale of good intentions sabotaged by the above.  Most of my clients have similar stories.
4. Support is essential. Tiger Woods had a coach before he became a golf sensation and having great support is significant part of why he became the golfer he is.   Successful people almost always have a combination of mentors, coaches, mastermind groups, prosperity buddies, etc.  I would like to invite you to explore the level of success support you have in your life.

No matter where you are in your success journey, understanding these 4 dynamics will increase your ability to manifest success.  I’d love to hear your thoughts about how you have seen these and other dynamics work in your life.  Please comment below and thank you in advance for sharing.