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Posts Tagged ‘EFT’

Lately, I’ve been seeing the issue of impatience pop up in a number of sessions.  As in, “Why is it taking SO LONG for things to change?!?“  When a theme repeats like this, I know it’s time to write about it.  If you’ve ever felt like your success plan was taking too darn long, I encourage you to keep reading.

How Listening to A Park Bench Made One Man Wealthy

One of my favorite stories about the energy dynamics of change comes from the spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle.  Today, many people know him as Oprah’s friend and best selling author.  Many people don’t know that before he became famous, Eckhart Tolle was stuck and confused.  He didn’t have a stable home or job.

Eckhart knew he wanted a different life, but he didn’t know how.  One day sitting on a park bench, Eckhart had a realization that changed his life and brought incredible success.  He realized that he was spending a great deal of energy fighting the circumstances of his life. Though he didn’t want to be confused and jobless, he was.

Eckhart understood that the only way things were going to really change is if he could “surrender” and “walk through the doorway of NOW”.  That insight lead to a feeling of profound well-being so strong that people started to approach him for guidance.  His career as a spiritual teacher was born.

What’s Your Park Bench?

You don’t have to have to be almost homeless to have this stuck energy operating in your life.  For me, it was being in position of going through a divorce and being “just over broke” doing work I didn’t like.

In fact, there is a basic energy equation when we are feeling frustrated.  It is:

I’m frustrated that I’m here (in a place I don’t want to be) when I want to be there (in a place I want to be more).

Wanting change and success is a good thing.  At the same time, it’s difficult for success to flow smoothly with this kind of tension in your system.

Easing Into Success with EFT

Energy intelligent people will recognize that being in this state of tension and having your focus on what’s not working is going to attract more tension into your life.  Let’s take a look at how to shift into a place of being more ready for change with EFT (if you want to learn EFT basics, click here).

Frustration Sequence – The Problem

Karate Chop: Even though it feels like things are taking too long to change and I’m feeling impatient, I’m willing to be a little kinder and gentler with myself anyway.

Eyebrow: I don’t know why things in my life aren’t changing faster.
Side of eye: I’m feeling impatient with the pace of change in my life.
Under the eye: I’ve been working on change for some time now.
Under the nose: Why aren’t I further along?
Chin: It’s taking SO long.
Collarbone: I feel lots of pressure to change things NOW.
Under the arm: I don’t like how long this is taking.

Take a deep breath and give a moment for this tapping sequence to settle.

Frustration Sequence – The Solution

Karate Chop: Even though in the past it feels like things weren’t changing fast enough, I’m choosing to find a more relaxed relationship with change now.

Eyebrow: In the past, I was focusing on what wasn’t going well in terms of change.
Side of the eye: No wonder I was feeling so frustrated.
Under the eye: What would happen if I could find a way to release that pressure?
Under the nose: What if I COULD relax about the pace of change in my life?
Chin: I wonder if I could actually change faster if I didn’t feel so much pressure?
Collarbone: I give myself permission to experiment with releasing this pressure.
Under the arm: I’m excited to work towards my success goals in more relaxed way.

Take a deep breath and give a moment for this tapping sequence to settle.

Summing it up

One of the great paradoxes about life changes is that they tend to happen the fastest when we are in a state that athletes call “The Zone”.  Pushing gets in the way of this.  Instead, use your favorite clearing tool to release the frustration and struggle patterns.

Next, allow yourself to experiment.   What would it be like to allow yourself to work from the Zone more?  How are you already doing this?  I’d love to hear your thoughts in the form of a comment below.

It was about 9pm on New Year’s Eve.  I was sweaty and had a big smile on my face from dancing.  A friend who knows what I do from Facebook (I promise not to insert my “why social networking is awesome” speech) and I started chatting.  After hugs and wishes for good things in the new year, she asked “Why does EFT work?”

This friend is trained as a counselor and knows many healing modalities.  She has just started using EFT and was already experiencing some results that got her attention.  Like many people, she wants to know “what is up with this stuff??”  It’s a very reasonable question.

Why does EFT work?

We have educated guesses, not answers.

On one level, the honest answer is “We don’t know.”  People like Dawson Church at The Soul Medicine Institute are researching EFT now.  A decade from now, we’re likely to have a much better understanding of the mechanics of energy psychology tools.

In the meantime, “We don’t know” is both not very satisfying and also, on another level, not completely true.

More than 30 years ago, Dr. Roger Callahan began practicing energy psychology in the United States.  Since than, hundreds of thousands of people have conducted tens of millions of EFT sessions.  Gary Craig alone has introduced over 1 million people to EFT through www.emofree.com.

While there is no definitive scientific answer about why EFT works, I believe that the embodied experience of the EFT community can help us understand this.

EFT is not the healer, love is.

In November 2009, Gary Craig did an interview with an Indian therapist named Jasmine Bharathan.  Click here to read the interview.  After two decades and countless of EFT sessions, Gary Craig sums up what many of us in the EFT world are coming to believe.  He says, “EFT is not the healer, love is”.

Albert Einstein once said, “You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.”  I am coming to see that at an energetic level EFT is largely a process that allows love and acceptance into the difficult places in our lives.  By increasing the available self-love and self-acceptance, stuck energies begin to move through our system.

Yes, this is a simplistic explanation.  In the coming years we are likely to learn much more about the detailed mechanics of different energy psychology tools.  At the same time, if my grandmother Edy were around today, I believe that she’d: 1) be proud of the healing work I do with EFT and 2) understand that increasing self-love around painful issues would allow a person to get on with her/his life.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this in form of a comment below.  Why do you think EFT works?

Lately, I’ve been hearing myself say to clients repeatedly, “you need a prosperity buddy.”  When something keeps showing up like this, I know it’s time for a blog post.  In this post, I want to share with you what a prosperity buddy (also known as a mastermind buddy) is, where to find one and what to do once you have one.

It's more fun with a buddy!

What the heck is a prosperity buddy?

The biggest lesson most success seekers need to learn is how to consistently nurture their deepest desires.  Honestly, most of us aren’t very good at doing this.  This is why most abundance programs fail – they don’t teach us how to do the kind of ongoing tending that real success needs.

A prosperity or mastermind buddy is a deliberately chosen friend who we agree to get together with regularly and nurture each other’s success intentions.

Buddies set aside time, usually either weekly or bi-monthly, to trade experiences of sharing honestly about what their dreams are and work on releasing the limiting beliefs and feelings that are getting in the way of manifesting those dreams.  My favorite way of releasing the gunk that’s blocking success is with EFT.

Where the heck do I find a prosperity buddy?

“OK, sounds good Paul,” you may say, “but where do I FIND a prosperity buddy?”  Notice that in the above section, I underlined the idea that buddies are deliberately created. I’m going to share several ideas of where you can find a prosperity buddy below.  At the same time, keep in mind that for the process to work well, you need to have a buddy that you feel comfortable sharing emotional and financial information with.  Selecting a prosperity buddy is a great time to use your spiritual awareness and intuitive skills.

That said, here are 5 places to find a prosperity buddy:

1. Among people you already know and trust. Some of you already know people who would make great prosperity buddies.  Perhaps you have a friend, colleague or acquaintance you trust and believe would be open to this kind of ongoing supportive relationship.  Avoid trying to be a buddy with someone you are in a romantic relationship with.
2. The readers of this blog. People who read and comment on this blog tend to be spiritual and fun success seekers who are familiar with EFT and the Law of Attraction.  They also tend to know other people who fit this description.   Feel free to leave a comment that you’re looking for a buddy.
3. The forums at the main EFT website (www.emofree.com).  A number of my clients have found prosperity tapping buddies by connecting with people in these forums.  Specifically, there is a forum called “Abundance” which is focused on using EFT for money and success issues.
4. TappingBuddies.com While the activity on this site is less than what I wish it were, this site is focused on helping people find tapping buddies.
5. Social Network sites. Facebook, Twitter, Linked In and other such sites ROCK!  I met my awesome Mastermind buddy, Sejual Shah, this way.  Through the magic of these sites, you have the opportunity to get to know someone in a safe and easy manner.  Once you meet someone you like the energy of, invite them to have a conversation to get to know them better.  If you get a good sense of the person, then bring up the idea of becoming prosperity buddies.

I’ve got a buddy.  What the heck do we do now?

Here’s the 6 steps to creating a good prosperity buddy relationship:

1. Start with appreciation. Appreciate your buddy and yourself for doing this.  Appreciation goes a long way towards creating the kind of safe and fun environment that will serve you well over time.
2. Leave judgment at the door. Your role is not to judge or fix your buddy.  Instead, help your buddy clear the blocks and track the progress that she is making over time.  Deep listening is also extremely valuable.
3. Agree to a regular meeting schedule. Remember the whole point of this relationship is to create an environment of consistent nurturing.  Most buddies meet either every week or bi-monthly.
4. Check in – from the heart. At the start of each meeting, take turns doing a short (3-4 minutes) check in.  Be authentic about what you are noticing in relationship to your deepest success dreams.  Pay particular attention to the emotions – that’s the key to where the energy is for you.
5. Use energy tools to remove the blocks. Once you’ve both checked in, decide whose turn it will be that meeting to do clearing work.   It’s best to devote a meeting to one person’s issues (alternating works great).  Use EFT or another energy tool to clear the blocks that are getting in the way of your success dreams.  Feel free to contact me if you need help learning to do this.
6. With the blocks out of the way, explore what action step you are inspired to do. Once the blocks are out of the way, aligned actions steps will naturally appear.  No pushing or heavy handed advice giving needed.

I hope this post inspires you create a prosperity or mastermind buddy relationship in your life.  In comparing notes with the dozens of prosperity and success coaches I know, our collective experience is that this is one of the most important predictors of people who actually MANIFEST their success dreams.

I have a confession to make.  I have been resisting creating an EFT product even though I get asked for one frequently.   After hearing myself yesterday explain to Till Schilling, the creator of Tappy Bear, why I’m best working with people and need to interact to shine (Resistance.  Blah, blah, blah.), I decided it was time to do some inner work.

There is an old folk saying that “curiousity killed the cat”.  It’s wrong.  Curiousity doesn’t kill cats – it melts resistance. So, I asked myself, “What is up with the fighting?”  I tapped on the feelings.  It turns out that EFT founder Gary Craig was right.  The results I got  made my jaw drop.

EFT can be fun!

Turns out, I had a belief system that went like this:  “Products are B-O-R-I-N-G.  I don’t want to be boring.  So I can’t create a product.”

As I released my “I don’t want to be boring” issue, new thoughts started flowing.  EFT is a very funny looking yet very effective thing we use to clear up some of the stickiest issues in our lives.  Lots of material for playing with the paradox there.   What if I wrote an EFT manual that was fun and effective? I instantly noticed one of the best indicators of high vibrational states of being – a smile.

Then a new limiting belief popped up (goodbye smile).  Would anyone actually want to buy my irreverent EFT manual? I’ll spare you the details of the self-worth issues behind that question.  I’ll give you the 140 character, Twitter version.  I tapped some more.  Darn EFT stuff worked again.

I remembered this really cool thing called a blog where I could get feedback from cool people like you.  I am thinking of writing a manual called From Chaotic to Clarity: How to Use EFT and Humor Attraction to Clear Overwhelm.  It would start out something like this:

What you hold in your hands is the world’s first highly irreverent and effective EFT for Overwhelm manual.  And, the truth is, this manual almost never got written.

From there, I would go on to share how I combine EFT and humor to help clients shift from feelings of overwhelm into states of being much clearer and more able to create the lives they want.   I would love to hear your thoughts in the form of a comment below.  Thanks in advance!

On November 6th-8th, there is a wonderful opportunity to learn more about EFT called The Tapper’s Gathering. It’s being organized by EFT Master Rue Hass (one of my favorite EFT practitioners) and there will 8 other highly experienced presenters – including yours truly. I’ll be sharing the Money Matrix process which uses EFT and Family Constellations work to easily clear abundance blocks and create the life of your dreams.

Rue recently sent out an email of questions that people are asking about the Gathering. I wanted to share them with you:

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What if I am new to tapping? Will this be too high level for me?

I just got off the phone with Chip Engelmann, an EFT and Law of Attraction Coach and a friend of mine.  In addition to planning an exciting teleclass series we’ll be offering soon, we also spoke about the most frequent request we both hear in terms of EFT for Abundance – that is “How do I know what to tap on?”   It got me thinking that about the need for a blog post that gives you some insight into how experienced EFTers help their clients zero in on specific abundance blocks.

Here’s the three best ways to help you know what to tap on when you’re using EFT for Abundance:

Abundance blocks can feel like The Great Wall

1) Using the Tailender Technique. In EFT language, your tailenders are the “Yeah, but ..” part of an affirmation.  In other words, they are like an industrial strength rubber band tied around your waist that holds you back from making progress towards what you want.  In the Using the Tailender Technique, you deliberate explore your tailenders and find the issues that need clearing by doing so.

Start by finding a clear money affirmation that is a) believable and b) exciting to you.  For instance, “I easily and consistently make $100,000 per year.”  Once you have your affirmation, take 3 deep breaths.  Notice how your body feels and what thought are going through your mind.  This is your baseline.

Now, say your affirmation out loud, “I easily and consistently make $100,000 per year.”  Notice what happens in your body.  Say it out loud again.  This time notice what thoughts go through your mind. The body sensations and thoughts that happen after you say the affirmation usually have the energy of constriction.  These are your tailenders, the things that block you from creating more abundance.

For a moment, I ask you to relax your resistance towards your tailenders.  Be willing to explore them.  What does that body sensation remind you of?  Who does that negative thought bring to mind?  Through a curious exploration of your tailenders, you can find the core issues that are limiting your ability to be more successful in an authentic way.  Once you know the core issues, you on them.

2) Clear by the Numbers. Chip Engelmann has developed a technique where he has clients explore their feelings about making different amounts of money.  In this approach, you start with an amount that feels comfortable to you.  For instance, suppose you currently earn $30,000 per year.  You would state, “I easily and consistently earn $30,000 per year.”  Then, you notice how that feels.  You keep increasing the amount until you notice some discomfort.  For instance, suppose $40,000 feels comfortable but you notice a feeling of “I don’t think so” when you say “I easily and consistently earn $50,000 per year.”   Explore that feeling of “I don’t think so”.  Notice where you feel it in your body and who it reminds you of.   Then tap on these issues.

3) Clearing your Money Matrix. My favorite way to find your blocks is Money Matrix work.  Your Money Matrix is the energetic web that determines your current relationship with money. It is a combination of the important feelings, beliefs and relationships that you have with money.  When we are not experiencing the kind of success that we want, it’s often because our Money Matrix is being influenced by negative energies.

Below is the simple 4 step exercise I use with clients to help them understand their current energetic relationship with money and to know what to tap on when applying EFT for abundance.  Here are the four steps:

• Take 3 clearing and centering breaths. The purpose of this is to help you relax your system and increase your ability to be aware. With each breath, find yourself becoming a bit more relaxed and more of attention available in the present moment.
• Imagine that you are in a room with money. It’s a simple room, comfortably furnished. Notice where money is in relationship to you. Is it to one side, in the front, outside the room, etc? Take a minute to notice what you what you see in your mind’s eye.
• Notice who or what else is in the room with you. After you have a sense of who and what these presences are, notice where these other presences (people or things) are in relationship to you and to money. For instance, one client felt a 3 inch plate glass wall that was between her and money.  Notice what you what you see in your mind’s eye.
• Notice the feelings in your body about your current Money Matrix. Your Money Matrix is encoded into the cells of your body.  Paying attention to the feeling in the snapshot you see is a powerful way to access your code. What do you notice in your body and on a feeling level as you view this picture in your mind’s eye?  Once you know what your current Money Matrix looks like, you can use EFT to clear what is in the way and allow money to come much more easily into your life.

It’s rare that a mechanical application of EFT leads to abundance results.  These three techniques about allow people who are new to EFT for abundance or haven’t yet seen the success they want to get a much better picture of what to tap on.  Because abundance is a whole lot easier to move towards without the Great Wall of China in the way.

I work with lots of EFT and Meridian Tapping Practitioners who want to grow their practices.  If you have been listening to anyone who’s someone in the Internet marketing world lately, you have heard that social media marketing is growing like the rabbit population during a very wet year.  One of the reasons that my own practice has grown faster than most is because early on I tapped into the power of social networking.

One of the big challenges when you’re starting with social networking is finding other people who share your passion. To help you do this, I came up with this list of EFT/MTT practitioners who tweet.  The people on list have extensive knowledge about tapping, are skillful at using Twitter as a social networking tool and are real go-givers.   Almost all are full time practitioners.

If you are passionate about EFT and other forms of energy tapping and would like to learn more about attracting more clients, I’d suggest taking a look at what this group is doing.  The link to each name takes you to their Twitter page and the bios are copied right from Twitter.  It would also be a good idea to check out their websites which is listed on the top right of their twitter page.
You can easily follow everyone on this list by clicking on this button:

BTW, if you or someone you know belongs on this list, feel free to send me a tweet.  I’m @PaulZelizer on Twitter.  Or you can send me an email.

In no particular order, here’s the list of the Top 30+ EFT/MTTer’s Who Tweet:

@EFTRadio, Eleanore Duyndam Bio Host-Producer of EFT Class on BlogTalkRadio – EFT and LOA Expert – Visionary using New Media for Social Transformation

@EmotionalEngine, Jade Barbee.  Bio: Love helping people heal and empower themselves, develop emotional awareness and find personal peace. EFT | Inner Theater practitioner

@EFTPraxis, Lynne Shaner.  Bio: Transformational maven, EFT Practitioner. I help biz peeps and pros clear blocks and create their best lives–with EFT and attraction principles.

@SerendipityJane, Lydia Proschinger Bio: I’m a human potential developer with a serendipitous approach, a single-mompreneur w/ a gift of teaching L.O.V.E. with EFT and LOA. Make yours a sparkling day!

@RebeccaMarina, Rebecca Marina.  Bio: EFT expert known for her divine voice for prosperity and blessed to be a channel for Mother God Azna.  Prosperity the easy, energy healing way.

@EFTDeb, Deborah Donndelinger.  Bio: Emotional Energy Coach: I help folks dramatically improve their lives through the skillful use of EFT and Family Energetics. Wife to Jim, mom to 3 great kids.

@ChipEFT, Chip Engelmann.  Bio: Lightworker, EFT/Meridian Tapping practitioner. Blocks removed on an energetic vibrational level, Author: Born Loser’s Guide to Abundance

@EFTSejual, Sejual Shah. Bio: EFT therapist and former antitrust lawyer specialising in resolving anxiety + depresssion, and improving career performance. LoA, catophile, and joyful soul.

@MiracleGoddess, Joann Skywatcher.  Bio: Spiritual Coach. I love INSPIRING & BEING inspired. Gifted. Intuitive. LoA. EFT/MTT. Founder: I Love My Body Teleclasses. MIRACLES phone sessions

@LorenFogelman, Loren Fogelman.  Bio: Mindset for Marketing Success, creating results based skills to master the marketing mindset. Receive my free ebook Tapping Into Emotional Freedom

@EFTCoachJane, Dr. Jane Mountrose.   Bio Author, EFT and Energy Healing Pioneer, Coach, devoted to helping people to realize their dreams, WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU!

@HolisticDrPhil, Phillip Mountrose.   Bio: Manifestation,  Author, Speaker, EFT, Energy Healing Pioneer, Spiritual Entrepreneur, Holistic Coach. Minister, Law of Attraction, LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU

@TappyBear, Till Schilling.  Bio: TappyBear man & EFT Practitioner.  My passion is to bring healing to all children, teach them while they are young. EFT is marvelous. Kids are so resilient.

@SerenityThruEFT, Pat Burns  Bio: EFT Practitioner & Reiki Master working with those who are seeking serenity in their lives.

@RevAnne1, Anne Presuel   Bio: Passionate @ the power of EFT, LOA and Affirmations – free gifts@ www.ThinkitBeitSeeit.com. Let’s Play!

@JanetHilts, Janet Hilts  Bio: I help consultants and coaches expand their reach by speaking with ease — and clearing other blocks to success — as a performance coach and EFT specialist

@SarahEFT, Sarah Holland  Bio: EFT practitioner and enthusiast! Author of ‘Overcoming Infertility with EFT’. Also pracitices Reflexology, and loves working with fertility and pregnancy issues

@EFTmama, Karen McLaughlin  Bio: Unschooling mom and Body Joy Coach. I help people with chronic illness, chronic pain and weight issues make peace with their bodies.

@PamelaBruner, Pamela Bruner   Bio: Success coach, helping peeps make a profit while making a difference, EFT Practitioner, Celtic harpist, hiker, collector of comfy business shoes

@GeneDavid, Gene Monterastelli  Bio: story teller, EFTer, learner, pilgrim

@EFTwithLinda, Linda Jones  Bio: EFT practitioner, mom of 2, wife, skiier, Nurse, tramper, sewer, cook, foodie, friend, supporter of organics and sustainable living practices.

@MeridianTapping, Brandy Oliver  Bio: Co-Founder of MTTProNetwork.com. Alternative Health & Wellness, Energy Medicine, Meridian Tapping (MTT, EFT, TFT, NET, WHEE) Pets, LOA, Nature, Healing

@AlchemistAnne, Anne Merkel  Bio: Conscious Transformation Coach Alchemist EFT Practitioner

@CreativeEFT, Betty Moore-Haftner  Bio: Enjoying life as a hypnotherapist and EFT practitioner, best job in the world!

@EFTSuzanne, Suzanne.  Bio: Passionate EFT Reiki Allergy Antidotes and Hypnosis holistic practitioner and author -  I follow you back!

@drnili, Dr. Nili Marcia. Bio: EFT, D.C., change enabler, weight loser, twitty ditty writer, enthusiastic life re-shaper; love science, TED, art, music, Abraham, ho’oponopono, cats and smiles

@GaryPWilliams, Hypno Gary Williams  Bio: Hypnotherapist, specialising in the Emotional Freedom Techniques and editor of the EFT World Magazine.Com

@EvesHealing, Shafiya Eve.  Bio: Reiki Master/Teacher, EFT Coach. EFT phone sessions, Meditation, Energy book-cd. Healing the root cause.

@lifechanges_uk, Carrie Winfield.  Bio: EFT Practitioner, NLP Coach, Reiki, That Foot Massage, Indian Head Massage.

@EFTAlive, Stefan Gonick.  Bio: I am an expert EFT practitioner, trainer and love coach. It is my passion to help people have greater success in their love life, business, and life in general.

@EFTMaster, Loretta Sparks.  Bio: Certified EFT Master, EFTCert-Honors / President, American Academy of Psychotherapists / Diplomate, Comprehensive Energy Psychology / Educator / Author

@TashaAbudarham, Natasha Aburdarham.  Bio: My journey of self discovery took me to some dark places, LOA & EFT got me through it & now All is Well!

@TheTappingMan, Rod Sherwin.  Bio: Get 2 Free ebooks about using EFT for Stress, Anxiety, Panic when you subscribe to my newsletter at http://www.tap4health.com

@Swalkingtree, Sequia Warner.  Bio: Massage Therapist, Vibrational Medicine Coach, EFT – Healthy Body Image Coach, Teach Essential Oils Therapy, Reiki, YouTube: http://tinyurl.com/cm92b9

@LivDelicious, Helena Summer Medena.  Bio: Life lover. Troublemaker. EFT Coach. Charisma Expert. Aloha Girl living my Delicious life in Hawaii:-)

@EFT4ADD, Charlotte Kamman.  Bio: I teach children to cope with their ADD and ADHD by using EFT, and I’m loving every minute of it!

@PaulZelizer, Paul Zelizer.  Bio: I help spiritual people increase their success and joy. Why struggle? Let EFT, attraction principles, and web 2.0 support your success.
Again, follow everyone on this list easily by clicking on this button:

Twitter allows EFT practitioners who want to attract more clients to learn from and connect with other practitioners who have more marketing experience.  You get to observe how others live their client attraction strategies.  It’s hard to imagine a more effective way to learn.  And you can’t beat the price – it’s free.

EFT for Abundance often doesn’t work because of our internal conflicts about money. This video shows you how to make more progress using EFT for abundance by clearing your internal money conflicts. Would appreciate your comments about whether this approach is helpful to you.